Small steps 4 Hannah

(written in March 2020)

Small steps 4 Hannah

Tuesday February 18, started like any other day. We all did our normal week day routine. We got kids ready for school, got ready for work and went on about our day. During the course of the day however. There was a news story, the details of which seemed incomplete. It was reported that and ex NRL player had died along-side his three children in a car fire and a woman was injured and in hospital. When I first saw it, I automatically assumed it was a car accident. Cars don’t just spontaneously combust under normal circumstances.

As the details of “the woman” came to light. The nations heart broke. 31-year-old Hannah Baxter had been doing what we all had done that morning. Getting her kids ready for the day and in a split second. Everything had changed. When the new reported that Hannah had died due to the injuries sustained in the fire, more details had emerged about the cause of the blaze and it seemed totally at odds with the initial framing of the story. The footy player who had reportedly died along-side his children had set the blaze which killed them. But for his actions Hannah and her three children Laianah, 6, Aaliyah, 4, and Trey, 3 would all still be alive. To say he died alongside them seemed insulting.

In no other situation would the perpetrator be referred to in this way. It’s the odd thing about adding the word domestic situation or former partner to a story such as this that I think makes people subconsciously a bit relieved. It’s always felt to me, it implied choice on the part of the victim and the collective community can be assured there is not a random serial killer roaming the streets, just this one violent offender terrorising this one particular person. Not that people are not sympathetic and horrified but it does somehow put some distance between you and the situation.

After watching Hannah’s family interviewed on Channel 9. I just felt broken. I know good men, the husbands and partners of friend who broke down in front of the TV and some that had to get up and leave the room. Their grief and shock just poured through the screen into every household in the country. It must have been so hard but you could tell that the three of them, Hannah’s parents and her brother were determined to the voice for the 4 people who had their voice and their story taken away.

When it was announced that there would be a Rally for Hannah held is Civic Park on March 4, I wanted to go and I wanted to take the kid. We arrived with several hundred other people. The speakers were from victim support groups and other organisations that work on the front lines of the crisis. There speeches were passionate and fiery. I was happy that in the time between the murders and the rally I was not alone in my emotions swinging from heartbroken to pissed off. Hannah did everything right, she left the situation, the family said the police took the situation seriously, her family were supportive and still she became a statistic.

There were some great practical suggestions about what people could do to help which I found a useful. For example, writing to you local member and talking about the lack of funding for local shelters so that if victims are fleeing a violent situation they have somewhere to go, talk about more strict punishments for those who break an AVO already in place, and one I had never thought of before was that a lot of people wont leave if they have to leave animals behind as they are scared of what while happen to the animals if left in the hand of abusers. We heard horrific stories on the night of abuser either threatening harm or actually killing family pets as a means of control.

I urge everyone to check out local advocacy groups like VOCAL (Victim of crime assistance league) and even the Animal Justice Party social pages and see what you can do to make a difference because something needs to change. Also visit Small steps 4 Hannah, which has been set up by the family to raise money and awareness. Do what you can to make sure, as a nation we grieve these losses with less regularity than we have been.