I grew up in a town that is often the butt of jokes. Dubbo has been made fun of during the Logies, on radio and in print. There has been memes about Dubbo all of which point to a town full of barefoot banjo players with a packet of smokes conveniently rolled up in their t-shirt sleeve. Nothing could be further from the truth and for those of us who grew up there, the town is like an annoying relative. We can make fun because it’s ours but if outsiders join in, we get very protective.
For those who have never lived inside the city limits, the things that draw them to Dubbo are the Zoo and Old Goal. However for ex locals, we come back for friends, family and the occasional funeral. My most recent visit was for my school reunion. Cue the ominous organ music.
Like most parents, I over think everything. Is my kid making friends, is she coping with school and god, I hope she doesn’t makes all the mistakes I made. Let me tell you, nothing will take you from minor obsession to full-blown panic like a school reunion. The memories of your own school years coming sharply into focus.
To add to this wave of slightly terrifying nostalgia we had this little shindig at The Commercial Hotel. When I was growing up, The Mersh, was where you spent Friday and Saturday nights. Memories of Ice Ice Baby and AC/DC blaring on the smoke-filled dance floor. It wasn’t a good night unless you got home after 5am wreaking of cigarettes and southern comfort, neither of which you has actually consumed. It graduated to a great night if, in addition to the above, you scored pastry goods, fresh from the oven, at the Village Hot Bake on the way home. Winner of Australia’s best pie not once but twice.
Having been to the Commercial recently, it is the perfect metaphor for this event. New owners took over several years ago and while the bones of the building remain the same, it has been totally renovated into this charming, sophisticated space with mouth-watering food and a very chic cocktail list. Kind of like us, it’s all grown up.
School, for some, was the best years of their life. For some, the worst years. For most though it’s a combination of both. I read through old diaries when getting ready for this trip. Parts made me laugh out loud and in parts there was genuine heartbreak about names that I can no longer even put a face to. If I’m honest, my first thought about the reunion was that I would rather take out my eye with a rusty butter knife. A little dramatic, I grant you.
My first year of high school had been a time of upheaval for me. Having moved towns 6 months into the year, the week after the funeral of a substitute grandfather, I came into a new group of people nervous and a bit sad.
I finally decided to go for two reason, Firstly I wanted the Kid to know that whatever your experience at school, it doesn’t define you. While you’re there, school is your whole world but more quickly than you know after your leave it becomes a distant memory. You will only regularly see a hand full of fellow students as weeks become years and years become decades. As you find your own voice as an adult, relationships will shift and change. One day you will look forward to catching up with people who shared this space with you during a special time in all your lives.
I’m glad i decided to go. We all laughed so hard that night, there was drinks, great food and some sad middle-aged dancing to Will Smith’s Boom Shake Shake Shake the room. Though when describing it that way to a friend who was there that night i was told it was “a well choreographed performance of “epic” proportions, the likes of which Dubbo has never seen” so i do stand corrected.
For anyone who has been to a reunion, you have to give a special shout out to the partner who accompany your class mates to these events. They spend all night, with people they have likely never met, hearing people reminisce about memories they weren’t part of. Let’s face it, that sounds about as much fun as accidentally peeing on a live electric wire. So bless them for hanging in there with us.
Being the non drinker in the room, i offered to drive one of my old friends and her husband home as we were moving from one pub to the next. They were staying with her mum and dad and as i drove up the very steep driveway, which i had done so many times over the years, my head filled with memories of a seeming much simpler time. When we all knew each others parents, we were in and out of each other houses all year round. It was warm and familiar.
It’s funny the things that stick with you. As my friend opened the front door and waved goodbye, i thought about the time her Dad had asked us over dinner to name all 7 Dwarfs in alphabetical order. Bashful, Doc, Dopey, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy, Sneezy … for those who are interested. You would be surprised how often that information has come in handy at Trivia.
I had a sensational night, which truth be told ended around 4am. A note to all the ladies, even if it’s been a big night, take off your makeup when you get home. There is nothing more frightening than waking up in the morning to a full facial imprint on your pillow.
My initial reservations aside, I got to reconnect with genuinely lovely people, some of whom i hadn’t seen since i was 17. You can’t beat that.Which leads me neatly to the second reason I decided to go and the reason I will always love Dubbo. My time there brought me to my two dearest friends, both of whom I met in year 7. Individually, two of the most amazing women I know. We have been through the worst things and the best things life can throw at you and even now we are in different parts of the country, I know my life would be darker without them. My hope is that The Kid’s school years bring her to the same kinds of friends.
So when you are heading out west, go see the monkeys, take photos of yourself with your head stuck in the stocks at the goal, grab a meal at The Mersh, go for your recovery breakfast at The Grapevine Cafe and be sure to talk to the locals. You never know, they might change your life.
LESSONS TO BE LEARNT FROM THE PREVIOUSLY DREADED SCHOOL REUNION. Most of these things are only funny to those who were there and some are only funny to my best friend and I. That’s the way it should be.
• Really drunk people are super impressed with my parallel parking skills (the word amazing was used countless times at 5 min intervals)
• Threatening to glass someone is a lot less menacing when you are holding a plastic cup
• a guy who will sit in the warmth of the front seat while you get assaulted by a marsupial is maybe not the guy for you.
• Being the strong silent type doesn’t really work on voice mail
• Two drunk guys of the same name trying to introduce themselves at 3am…very confusing for the guys but funny as hell for the sober onlooker.
• Eye ball kissing is going to be the next big thing.
• A witty response to a situation can’t be heard through a double glazed window. You just end up looking like a disturbed naked person.
• Always remember to take your pants.
• Mostly, it’s been too long between drinks. Awesome night.
On tour with the kid 
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